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CAFFEINE, NICOTINE, & ALCOHOL
Bored to death in heaven, & down alone in hell. Demons jeer my attempt to be free.
Bipolar wasted youth,
never sleep never die.


Like the stars above,
they shine and shine over me.


Your voice,
was the soundtrack of my summer.
Every saint has a past, every sinner has a future.

Why do people only regret after they made a mistake that can't be undone?
Why do people only regret when it's too late?

Sometimes I hate you, sometimes I miss you, and sometimes I think what went wrong with me.

Reading your past blog posts now make me feel worse than I did before.
I can barely remember what really happened back at that time.
But now as I read, unknowingly tears started flowing down my cheeks, it hurts..

It hurts because you were the friend who hated me but still stayed because I had no friends.
It hurts because how much we've been through but the friendship still ended.
It hurts because I was playful and didn't know how bad things would turn out.
It hurts because I realized what a bad friend, what a bitch I was.
It hurts because there's absolutely nothing that I can do about to change anything anymore.

I've lost a dear friend, once the most awesomest fake daddy.

I really do hope you're better off without a friend like me, wish you all the best in your life. :)




Unhappily ever after

Happy birthday?
Not very happy at all as predicted.

Nobody knows why I hate birthdays so much. There's just too much disappointments.
How many have promised to remember, to be there, and to celebrate with. None fulfilled those promises.
I'm sick and tired of having to go through that kind of pain over and over again.
If I don't care about my own birthday, then I won't get hurt over and over again like this anymore.

Who doesn't want friends who is willing to plan surprise celebrations for them?
Who doesn't want to celebrate their birthdays happily every year with people they love?
I'm human too, of course I want those too.

I guess it's just easier to just pretend that this day doesn't exist at all.